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I was a pornstarI was 18 when i came to LOS ANGELES full of dreams of a better and glamorous life.In my hometown i was considered a beautyqueen ,guys were all over me,flattering and telling me that hollywood would fall to my feet the minute i would get there,little did i know …..Let me tell you a little about my background ,my family.My parents weren’t rich ,mind you not poor either ,they were average.I think they loved eachother but sex was not something they kept inside the marriage,in fact they were serialcheaters having countless relations ,flings with all kind of people.When my mother turned 40 she realised that her best time was over and she basically stopped having trysts and turned to another friend : alcohol,lots of it ,i came home from school and would find my mother passed out drunk on the couch or wherever she fell,my father turned her into a clinic for about at least 5 times untill he realised that nothing really helped ,shortly after comming back it started all over ,so basically he gave up . In her absence it wasn’t rare that he would bring other weman to our house so from early on i realised that sex and love were something completly different and fidelity inside the marriage was not a strict necessity.What i learned allso in time was that my beauty and sexy apearance could get me allmost everything i wanted from men,boys i mean .By the time i turned 16 i had not only a steady going sexlife and my virginity was a distant memory,i won’t get into details but sex wasn’t what i tought it would be but it gave me what i wanted: power over menSo when i came to LA having little money i started looking out for a job and a place to live,i found both rather quickly,a waitress job and a shared flat with two roommates,i soon found ouy that being a waitress wasn’t exactly what i wanted so i started asking around for something better güvenilir canlı bahis siteleri ,closer to my ambitionsOne of my new found roommates gave me the adress of an agent she worked for ,turned out he was hiring models for fotographs,swimmware and lingerie,yesss i tought i’m going in the right directionMy first steps into the industry were promising ,i was payed very well for a short worktime ,i would pose for pictures not realising that i was showing more and more of my body but in my mind that was what was expected of me By the time i turned 19 my agent told me that there were a lot of models doing the same i did and that maybe it was time for me to do some “serious” work,better payed allso and so i began to shoot nudes turning quickly into soft porn and after a while full blown porn for some magazines,some of those pictures were with other girls wich i liked ,some of those girls were pretty much like i was and we exchanged experiences and became friendsNow you have to understand that being a model doesn’t mean you did your work and go home ,no way ,we had to go to partys,showed ourself to the people at the partys in short we needed to be seen,it was like a promotion campagne or if you like public relationsThe people hanging out at these partys were mostly fotographers,moviedirectors , rich (dirty) older men and models like usIn the beginning i liked that lifestyle but after a while the touches ,the groping of my ass and breasts became enoying and intolerable untill one of my “friends” gave me a little pill to take off the edges she said and i have to admit it helped ,i soon found out where i could get hold of those pills without a prescription and my world was ok again After a short while i realised that one pill in the morning would help me trough the day but i needed one more in the evening to keep my güvenilir illegal bahis siteleri balance.It didn’t take me very long to realise that my stash of pills lasted lesser and lesser and so i started experimenting,i found out that with a little alcohol,vodka for instance my pills would last longer and they kept me in a very enjoyable blissAll of this ,pills on the black market ,partying,having to look good all the time costed handfulls of money and it didn’t last long before money became a problem,a big problemAnd so it happend that one day i went to see my agent and asked for more work and he gave me a speech about economis and that modelling wasn’t what payed the bills and that the buseness was going down but that there were alternatives,one of those was shooting movies,oh not the gory kind with blacks or monstercocks but with pretty young girls like i was and he gave me the adress of a studio where they were holding castings and being pretty much desperate i went thereThe guy who did the casting asked me a lot of intimate questions,ordered me to take off my clothes and authorised himself to pinch my nipples ,hard,squeezing my breasts and stroking my genitals,after a while he asked me what kind of video i wanted to do and i answered truthfully,only girl/girl,he looked at me with a grinn and answered “yeah ,we can start with that” and i did ,first just solo’s ,masturbation shoots for about twenty minutes, i kinda liked those ,my pills and wodka helping it went real smooth,then i did girl/girl for a year with stunning girls,some of them very nice ,some of them real bitches ,the nice ones gave me advice and some tricks i could use during shooting,to be honnest some of the girls really turned me on ,not to the point of having orgasms(that was a big no-no on the set) but still it felt nice,some girls gave güvenilir bahis şirketleri me some real good advise like putting a finger to your partners labia and licking it instead of her clit ,out of cameravieuw off course,another one was to masturbate shortly before the shoot to “soften and opening your pussy” as they called it,i could allso use a dildo to stretch my vagina so it wouldn’t hurt when they put fingers inside your vagina,what all this wouldn’t do was to make me wet enough and so i started to use spit and lube not to have an irritated vagina from sticking fingers inside meThe very first time a guy participated in a shoot i didn’t know about it ,they just told me he was there just to watch and jerk off to what me and the other girl were doing,yeah right ,it didn’t take very long before he joined innThat was in fact the beginning of the end ,from that point on it escalated rapidly,i had to do B/G BB/G,my taking my pills in the morning was quickly spinning out of controll ,my alcoholconsomation went trough the roof and i did my “acting” completly unaware what was happening ,i started to use x.. before a shooting or a few healthy lines of c…,my directors told me not to open my eyes ,it was too obvious what i was on,i was like a zombie most of the timeIt all came to an end when i fell into a c*** because i overdosed on the set ,my ass was bleeding from exessive penetrations,i had a few std’s despite being tested and i ended up in a clinic for several weeks,three months in fact ,i went into detox and i cleaned up my act and with good expert professional help i got trough it allThe very first thing i did when i came out i took a bus and went home,my mother was still drinking a lot but and i decided to help her ,it came to me that all she needed was love and attention of the people she loved and how could i refuse her that?I work in a boutique now ,not as pretty as i was eight years ago ,i look quite older but i don’t care,i have my mum to take care off and a few years later i met a fantastic girl who now is my wife and i’m finally happy I was a pornstar and lived to regret it ,i’m at peace now with myself and my life What can i say ,life goes on
Ben Esra telefonda seni bosaltmami ister misin?
Telefon Numaram: 00237 8000 92 32
