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The day my life would change forever – that sounds like such a dramatic thing to say, yet there is no other way to describe it – started like most days at Digital Interactive Gaming. That is, busy and fast paced with the usual pressure of what we call the “death march” of a software product release. That phrase also sounds quite dramatic though it is more of a grind than a march. This time I did mind the long days of coding since I had not been seeing anyone since Jennifer left.

She had grown tired of being an “engineer’s widow” whenever a new app release was on the horizon. The fact that I was the team lead and had numerous people counting on me did not seem to count for much in her estimation. So perhaps it was the tedium, and the loneliness, that made me particularly vulnerable to what had happened on the fateful day I met the young woman who would cause me to lose my self. Or maybe that is just is something I tell myself to hang on to the last shred of what I once was.

It was almost noon on that day, and I was headed to the break room for some more caffeine as I was planning to work through lunch break. I was passing by one of the empty conference rooms when I first laid eyes on her. She was with Josh, one of our young web developer interns. Sitting in one of the aeron chairs was a strikingly beautiful woman about Josh’s age. I paused by the door to the room.

“Hey Dale,” he said cheerfully. “This is my girlfriend Candice. She surprised me for lunch today.”

“Hello Dale,” she said, extending her hand. I shook it and immediately her soft, lovely and penetrating hazel green eyes. She gave me a look that was oddly both warm and somewhat predatory at the same time. Her hair was also brown and seemed to flow down to and caress her shoulders. Her lips were full and sensuous, and it was hard not to notice her firm, toned and curvaceous figure. It took everything I had at that moment to stay professional and appropriate, but I was able to avoid leering.

“Nice to meet you Candice” I said, feeling relieved as I came out of my momentary state of trance. “Make sure you take her somewhere decent,” I said jokingly to Josh.

“Oh he always treats me well. He’s a real man.” Candice said with a glimmer in her eyes. The edges of her mouth curved into a faint smile.

“Thanks!” Josh replied. “Hey babe since your ankle is sore I will bring my car around from the garage so it’s out in front. I’ll text you when it’s there.” he said as he bent over and kissed her on the cheek.

“Fine. I’ll hang out here and chat with Dale while you are doing that.” Josh had a strange look of concern on his face briefly, then he returned to smiling as he left the room, I knew that he knew I was always very respectful

of women in the workplace in general and of coworkers partners specifically, and besides as I was entering middle age I was sure I was no sort of threat anyway to him so I dismissed it.

“I’m sorry about your ankle,” I said to break the ice.

Candice smiled faintly. “You can stop apologizing. I’m a runner, so it happens sometimes.” She leaned over in the chair and began rubbing her ankle.

As she leaned over her breasts, which were in a tight blue blouse with a plunging neckline, squeezed together. I looked to the side of the table, but even with my peripheral vision

I could see how amazing they were. Michelangelo himself could not have sculpted more shapely and perfect breasts.

Candice looked up at me, still in this position as she massaged the sore ankle. “Go get me a coffee. Black,” xslot she said.

Normally I might have been taken aback by the abruptness of her request, which seemed to border on being a command. But I needed to get out of the room for a moment to regain some composure, and I told myself she was probably just a little cranky from the pain.

I returned from the break room with the coffee and handed it to her. She was sitting upright once again, and was sitting at the head of the conference table.

“Very good,” she said, and as she took the cup her fingers lightly grazed mine and she flashed me a quick smile. What I did not realize at the time was this was a reward for proper behavior.

“Would you sit and talk with me for a moment? If you have time,” Candice said, waving towards the chair next to her.

I didn’t have time, of course, but I took the chair and sat next to her at the table. I wasn’t getting any other break today and besides she was a guest here and didn’t know anyone besides Josh probably.

“So you are in charge here?” she asked looking at me once again with her brown eyes. So oddly enchanting, warm but with a strange firmness in them as though she were continually studying anyone who met their gaze.

“Well I’m the tech lead so I’m in only in charge of other developers, which is worse than herding cats,” I replied..

“I see. ” she said. “Still, it must be stressful. All that responsibility.” As she spoke, she produced some lip gloss from her purse, which I noticed was a Louis Vuitton. I started to wonder what kind of job she must have since Josh didn’t make that much, but I began to become distracted watching Candice apply the gloss to her lips. Damn, I thought, that dude is one lucky SOB.

“Do you think this goes well with my blouse? I just noticed you admiring it a few minutes ago. At least I am going to be polite and say it was the blouse you were looking at.”

I felt a hot flush as the blood ran to my cheeks. I nervously fumbled through a quick reply. “I am truly sorry if I looked at any way that made you feel uncomfortable, that is not how I normally conduct myself.”

Candice’s expression changed to amusement. “Relax, they do get a lot of attention. It’s perfectly ok. Josh likes to tease me and call me a heart breaker.” She then said with a tilt of her head.

“The most heartbreakingly beautiful girl I ever hope to see.”

I was stunned. “That last line is from Cat’s Cradle. He was talking about Mona.”

She looked at me again, this time looking more like the girl next door type with her facial expressions. “Yes I love Vonnegut.”

I felt a new wave of admiration. This lady was bright as well as beautiful. But this was not a time to get into some schoolboy crush mode, I thought and tried to change the topic a bit.

“So where do you work?” I said.

“I’m studying psychology in the evenings. And I’m a writer of sorts to, I plan on expanding that. I have a little side business as well that brings in some extra money.”

“I’m quite impressed,” I said.

“I KNOW you are,” she said. Her eyes flashed a vaguely predatory look once again.

I was tongue tied for a moment, but her phone chimed. She pulled a pink iPhone from her expensive purse and glanced at. “My man Josh is out front, and I have a gift!” she exclaimed.

“Good man, getting both the car and something for you,” I said.

“Who said it was from him?” she said impishly as she stood up. “You’ve been very good to me Dale, talk to you later” she said as she left xslot Giriş the room.

I waited silently as she left the room and headed towards the exit to the office. I tried not to look at her backside as she left, but I could not help but notice it was as perfect as the rest of her. She glanced quickly over her shoulder at me as she went through the door, flashing her smile once again.

It took me almost a minute before I remembered I needed to go back to work.

————————

I tried to dive back into the code base for the app for the rest of the day. I found it was very tough going as my thoughts kept drifting back to Candice all throughout the afternoon.

I thought not only of her beauty but wondered what else she read, what else went on in her mind. After a few hours I realized I was getting very little done and the deadline was coming in a couple of weeks. Get it together, I thought to myself. I just need to start dating again, that is what this strange schoolboy type fascination was all about. As soon as he was past this next app release, he’d get out on the dating scene, with an age appropriate professional woman and then he’d forget about this strange fixation towards a younger and unavailable girl.

I had managed to center myself again just long enough to start writing code again when the chat application on my phone started chiming. The chat id was for members of my team to contact me after hours if they were working from home, so I picked it up thinking there was an issue.

“Hi, its Candice” the message read when I glanced at the phone.

My heart jumped involuntarily.

“Candice, how did you get this id?” I typed back.

“I got it from Josh. I know it’s for work, but I just wanted to talk to you about something, and I didn’t think you’d mind.”

“I don’t mind at all. But it is unusual. What did he say when you asked?”

“Oh he is cool, he knows about my business and he knows it makes me happy. It is web based and I thought I would pick your brain for some ideas, if you are not too busy.”

“Well I would be happy to although this is a bad time.”

“I’m sorry, I won’t bother you again” she replied.

Suddenly I felt a wave of panic, as though I might never hear from her again. Before I could process the thought further I found myself immediately typing, “Actually its quite alright, I could use a break right now anyway.”

“Awesome! Take a look at this link and let me know what you think.”

I clicked on the url she sent and it took me to a book list on amazon. I saw a list with many of my favorite authors.. Camus, Vonnegut, Kafka. I was impressed with the selection and I did not notice until some time later that the top of the list read Goddess Candice’s Wish List.

“I know you we talked about books we enjoyed but didn’t really have time to discuss. What do you think?”

“I like your choices!” I typed. My brain was working more slowly than usual. But it was then I finally put it together – her expensive clothing and accessories, the “gift” she saw on her phone in the conference room, and the amazon wish list I was looking at in front of me.

“So this is your business?”

“Yes, it’s a part of it any way. The on line part, and just one of many ways men give me what I expect from them. You could be very useful with your app knowledge in helping me expand.”

I paused in shock. It felt wildly inappropriate to be discussing this sort of thing with someone I hardly knew let alone a coworker’s girlfriend.

“Well xslot Güncel Giriş I could tell you about the technical part anyway but I really don’t know about the BDSM stuff.” I typed nervously.

“You are wound up pretty tight aren’t you? I only wanted your opinion, not to turn you into something you are not.” she replied.

“Sorry, I guess I was in the middle of a lot of work and kind of overreacted.”

“You can stop apologizing again. Now tell me how you feel about my business model.”

“Well, more power to you I suppose.” I typed as I tried to assert my male ego once again. “If you can find men foolish enough to humiliate themselves like that.”

I instantly regretted sending the text. It sounded harsh I thought. Did I offend her?

“These men are just men like you. Only they are very smart. They realize life is much more pleasurable when they let go of a little of their control to me.”

“I’m sorry I called them foolish. But I am not like them. I am not a kinky person.”

“That’s fine” she typed calmly. I noticed she had changed her chat avatar. She was posed in another low cut blouse in the photo, with her eyes seeming to be looking directly at me.

“You seem like a pretty rational person. Actually the only reason I really sent you the wishlist because I know you are a Vonnegut fan and maybe you could tell me what to read next.”

“They are all good. Maybe Bluebeard” I typed as I looked at the list again.

“I would love to read it” came the response. My hand hovered over the link to purchase it before I put my hand back on the desk.

“It’s probably less than you spend on lunch. When you go. You didn’t even go for lunch today, so you could easily buy it for me.”

“I told you I am not one of your marks.” I typed. I tried not to look at her avatar photo. I could feel my heart pounding faster.”

“I believe you. I mean, do it if you want to. It’s just a little experiment. I saw your eyes light up when I got that gift message today. Like you were just curious to know what it feels like. You do want me to read it anyway right?”

“yes. I do” I texted back. I was thinking about her reasoning. It wasn’t much money, and it was a good book. I wasn’t kinky so what was the harm in playing along, I thought, as I stared at the cleavage in the avaor photo. My hand was trembling visibly as I clicked on the link. I heard a faint voice inside me say ‘what the fuck’..

I felt an incredibly strong rush as I saw the confirmation page. “Your order to Goddess Candice is confirmed.” I looked down and to my shame, I had grown erect.

“I bought it for Candice” I typed hurriedly, my head swimming.

“Good boy” she typed back. She attached a photo to her message. I clicked on it nervously. When I opened it, there was a photo of Candice in white costume that looked reminiscent of a Greek goddess.

She was wearing boots and the point of view in the photo was upwards, as though the viewer were laying at her feet.

I found it difficult to form thoughts as I gazed at the photo and her words. I was briefly angry at myself for being aroused at all this, but oddly enough this only seemed to intensify the rush.

“I know you are sitting there with a hard on, aren’t you bitch?”

“Yes” I typed back.

“Yes what?”

“Yea Goddess Candice.” I heard myself moan to my disgust.

“I can always spot them. Josh was worried about me adding his boss to my little collection, but he knows me well enough by now. You will come to know me better in the days ahead too as I make more of your decisions for you. But right now you have only one decision to make. You have only one chance to make the right one.”

“I submit to you Goddess” I typed.

And so it had begun over coffee…

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